So a bit of backstory to start the article. I pushed myself super hard Friday – Sunday and I knew that at the very least yesterday, Monday really had to be a rest day for me. And so it was. However the very process of getting back into tip-top shape so to speak has been enlightening to say the least. This is what I would like to share about today.
First of all, I couldn’t really bring myself to do anything for much of Monday. Of course I did some super basic must-dos, like walking 5k steps and posting on my FB Daimon, Eudaimonia Practitioner page which I am planning on building up, definitely. However, I couldn’t really bring myself to even ease into relaxation and a lackadaisical day of leisure.
In a sense, I was totally spent and not even in the mood to do so. Like, for instance, I have this regular enough yoga practice which I do when I have the energy to. However yesterday, I didn’t do much at all, but it was like huh, my body innately resisted putting in the effort. I would have had to force myself to do it, but of course I didn’t. That would be so wrong.
The breakthrough came with singing. I turned on my singalong playlist thinking that it might help, but… I didn’t immediately start singing along. And so I was thinking yeah maybe this just isn’t gonna do for me today. I was just about to turn Spotify off… but then I started gently humming along a little. And yes, I went with the flow, and eventually an aha!
From just humming along with breaks in between, I just gradually managed to ease into fully singing along again! And even, the very last two songs I sang – I won’t say what they were, but I was 100% into it and like singing my heart out. It was so cathartic in that sense! And that was at evening time, and in that moment I was fully the liberated me…
Fast forward to today. Too lazy to add images to this post yeah. So anyway.
I have been doing stuff like recording myself singing a bit just for fun like, maybe twice a week. Just for me yeah. So today I wanted to do it, but meh. I didn’t really have the motivation it seemed. It was so lame.
But then tentatively I had a brainwave. I tried that again. I went to turn on that Spotify singalong playlist, and it was a total abject mess again but yeah some humming still and eventually it fully blossomed into singing ability. It was nice. Really nice. And afterwards, yeah. After just like 3 songs I totally couldn’t stop myself from going off to the living room to do the recording.
Hah! And that’s not all. Another similar experience happened later on in the day, which together with that culminated in some overall insights.
I felt unmotivated to go walk 2km, but if I did it even yesterday of course I should do it today! Well technically, it’s like I was even more of a do-nothing yesterday but still. Well! But then I had a brainwave.
So I suddenly recalled something that I do every now and then as an add-on to the walking, which I…sigh… didn’t do last week. And that’s basically some sort of Youtube Zumba yeah. Keeps me active and mobile so. And! Said activity, I know I found fun before. So, wouldn’t it provide me with the spark and motivation for the exercise instead?
Long story short. I replaced some steps with it. 1543 steps, 1.23km to really be precise. And I did enjoy it, yeah! But then I felt that I didn’t want to overstimulate my nervous system which was already having a great workout and so I walked the remaining distance to 2km instead.
Mission accomplished!
And it’s yabai or insane how I totally transmutated this into a far more productive day with many results to show for it by adding in this article too. You know, considering that I’m not in form so to speak, I was truly totally considering leaving the article to tomorrow. Y’know, I set myself Monday-Wednesday as my self-imposed timeline for it yeah.
But the inspiration came, and I could not stop it lolz.
Anyway, let me now link this back to the title of the article. Motivation is the ignition of a spark. And kokoro o moyase basically means to set your heart ablaze okay.
So the theory is this. When you’re fully embodying you and immersed in some activity, it’s literally akin to you being set ablaze. And it’s really like that highest state of potentiality, or what is possible. So sometimes you know, motivation is totally internal and sends you somewhere. Great! However, when it isn’t, I’d say it’s up to you to light up that spark!
Igniting it, from an ember, thereby setting you ablaze!
See, sometimes, when I’m lacking the motivation to go for my afternoon walk… y’know, I’ve even GrabFood a cheesecake and matcha before yo. From Starbucks see. I also totally get how sometimes foodstuff is a motivating factor for exercise! I mean of course, typically maybe not, because it defeats the whole point of burning the calories anyway sigh.
However, that’s still a totally legit way of being if you think about it.
Option 1: Zero motivation, zero exercise. Fattened up!
Option 2: External motivation via foodstuff, exercise done! Healthy lifestyle, not fattened up.
Isn’t Option 2 obviously better? It’s just rewarding yourself! I mean if you wanna be extreme about it, you can even say your masculine side goes exercise so that it can princess treatment and reward your feminine side ahem. Btw saying this because everyone has both polarities to them truly.
So in the aforementioned example, Person A is using the foodstuff to light up their spark and ignite it. Resultant: them set ablaze, powerfully, healthily exercising! Yeah!
So sometimes, there is a total lack of motivation, and you won’t do stuff. I kinda think that what today has done is expanded my realm of possibilities by making me see that ah, truly, this is the mechanism through which those possibilities are brought into actualisation. You simply find a way to ignite that spark, and what results is motivation into motion.
Like, from what I have experienced today… often the state of being ablaze really is amazing and unparalleled. It truly slays. However, our selves at the initial phase pre going into the activity are just sigh and mid. But if we then identify the spark and light it up, it’s truly a powerful inroad… and then we serve. (Idk just trying new age slang yo) Going from hell to heaven even!!
So finally I think I’ll provide 2 examples of where I have not felt motivation in the past. Of course for things that I feel super aligned with, man, of course I’ll just know that I have to do them and do ’em, literally…
But when the alignment is not so much… well, meh.
First example. Learning how to scoop up the shuttlecock with the badminton racket. I’m like – what, you think I’d do it to be performative? Just to look cool? No thank you! I can totally just bend down and pick it up on my own, hah! Being performative is so egoic, lame and degrading!
Second example. Doing the composing for the song I’ve written. Like, I don’t really think I’m that talented in this at all you know. Compared to the total ease and fluidity with which the lyrics and most basic melody comes, I mean, ah, I have to put in so much more time and effort… How meh.
Now, I have identified two things that often strike me in such scenarios. The first is this. Do I have some hidden fear block in my subconscious? Some sort of secret trauma due to how much effort I expended, during that initial unsuccessful Try 1?
The second is this. Am I really that aligned with it in the first place? So maybe I’m not that aligned with it, and that’s why the internal motivation is not appearing that pushes me to do it. Huh. Maybe it’s me thinking too much and 画蛇添足, or adding an additional brushstroke to an already completed painting. Totally excessive and unnecessary yo. I’ve got enough already.
So as you can see it’s kinda me gaslighting myself lolz.
Yep and I also want to quickly point to how I finally got myself to do some composing last week. So it was like: I always felt like I should do it but just couldn’t summon any internal motivation to. So I just waited around, and the very moment I saw something I went – Ah! This is a sign from the universe that I should do this now! Why! Easy! That was reason enough for me to go do it! I mean of course, it was totally external, yeah, but still!
Uh… this may be kinda gaslighting, idk, but I kinda suspect that my mind was just looking for any good sign to just interpret that way maybe. Like, ya know, the confirmation bias? Hmm.
But anyway. After my most recent insights, I’m wondering if I could look at all of this another way.
Let’s say I lack the motivation to do something. Let’s not even go into fear because I don’t wanna gaslight… wait. There is something I could mention.
Ya know, the things that we do most easily are the things that are most within our comfort zone, necessarily after we have already tried it out one or two times. Their defining characteristic is that we basically totally can envision the start-end process already. We know how it will feel since honestly speaking, we’re used to it. So, our nervous system IS safe.
Personal examples for me might be like playing the piano for a bit or doing yoga, even the Zumba earlier. They’re just easy! add-ons to my staple mainstay routines. I totally get how the process will be like already. Thus therein lies the element of familiarity… Ya know I daresay if I were conceivably to start doing badminton racket practice just once or twice a week, it’d totally evolve into habit for me already.
Then the motivation requirement would have drastically plummeted lolz. It’s like a well-trodden path that I’m already used to travelling. It’s simply!! something that I could totally, comfortably and breezily do when I feel like my energy aligns, and my mood feels right. Just like eating a dessert – I don’t do it usually, but I do it occasionally when I just… feel like it.
Hey! They call it intuitive eating, ya know! Taylor Swift does it too!
Hah whatever, I’m seriously thinking I’m pushing myself a little too hard writing this article and now I’m kinda in a psychedelic high or something lolz. Hey, not that I actually consumed any substance or anything okay! A figure of speech, only that!
Huh. Time to wrap this up.
And this is why comfort zones should be leapt out of. Because you know what? I’m actually feeling kinda certain that once I’ve done these things a few more times, it’ll be much! more straightforward and accessible as this state of being to enter! And it won’t be the feeling of… ah! I feel a lack of motivation to do this. This just isn’t who I am, what I’m used to…
To a simple: Oooh! Well, I feel like I could do this today! Well, why not I just go do this then!
Hmm, I feel like I kinda hit upon some covert truth there? Oh yeah right aha! I kinda totally get it! The trodden path analogy totally seriously works imo! Oh wait! You could totally link it to neural pathways and repetition, to stamp said activity in too as a habitual state of being!!!
Ugh. Whatever. Let me just end off with two things.
The first is this – visualisation. Of your future self once you’ve succeeded in attaining said thing/skill. I suppose that might be an effective way of lighting up the spark? Because it reminds you of why you’re even doing it in the first place! And kinda propels you to said future reality also, nice!
I mean, if you didn’t have a desire to go do said thing in the first place, you likely wouldn’t even have started trying to do it yeah! Because it’s INN you!
Huh, at least trust that it’s there for a reason and even if it isn’t gonna stick! with you ultimately it’s still an experience you gotta try out and savour first!
Thing 2: Firework.
You just gotta ignite
The light
And let it shine
Just own the night
Like the 4th of July
Cause baby you’re a firework! Go on let your colours burn!
Kthxbye! I really just got the inspiration for this article during afternoon exercise itself but I still hope it make enough sense yeah. Till next week! Adios! 🙂
Man! This is literally kinda stream of consciousness writing already welp. I’m running on fumes kinda. Lolz. Not really!!! in a state to go read back and reflect so! Outta here! …Tsukareta! Kaeru zo!
…idk.