Hey all! So I’ve decided on my topic for today. Basically, it’s comparison.
Now, when thinking about comparison, I guess the first thing that generally comes to mind is the negative sort.
For instance. Look! My friend’s son got all As in his exams. Look! He has such a good job and he’s gonna get married soon!
Well, I’ve probably mentioned this already, but I believe this form of comparison to be quite disempowering. It doesn’t even make logical sense, even.
See, if you think of everyone as being characters in a game, they’ve simply got their own timeline and growth arcs. So yeah, maybe so-and-so is meant to seem really distinguished at such a young age. However, so-and-so is instead meant to remain hidden and gradually, through the unflagging efforts they exert, come to shine like a star.
Who knows? At the end of the day, everyone’s got their own character arc! Like, trying to compare them is simply like trying to compare apples to oranges!
Hey, also, everyone’s got their own strengths. Some may be so conventionally gifted, but even those without will have the unconventional talents of their own brand as well! Yes!
Meanwhile, the endgame, if any, is where everyone has managed to draw out these strengths of theirs and enter their highest potential. In said process, though, you just MUST head down that growth journey, regardless of how long it may take relative to others or not!
In spirituality, for instance, you may hear them say: There is no delay. You are still on track. Keep at it and sooner or later you’ll get to where you want to go?
Well yeah, that’s it!
See oftentimes this comparison act we do is limited by our very limited worldviews. For instance, it may be caught in ego and this desire to be validating in terms of status, face or image. Nothing!! more than that! Like, to be mean, you could even think of it like a child wanting a toy to make them happy!
Meanwhile, there’s also this pitfall of sorts. Sometimes, yes, you compare, but your worldview itself is just so limited that it is simply impossible for you to understand where this person is coming from! You simply judge it based on your own value system. Meanwhile, who knows? That system could be thoroughly flawed or simply unable to coexist with that of the other party, whose own system totally diverges!
Anyway, I’ll just end there about this disempowering comparison. Nothing much to say about it at all, really. The meat’s in the empowering one!!!
And, ready, here I go! Alright!
So basically, the empowering version of comparison is a really cool one imo… so, ever heard of duality?
I’ll just give a super quick intro to it.
So, if darkness didn’t exist and light was everywhere, how would you know the value of light?? Similarly, if cold didn’t exist and heat was everywhere, how would you know the value of heat?? Impossible!
Similarly, one very important element of comparison is that see, it actually serves to highlight and show a distinct difference between opposites.
For instance, someone who fails the national exams could possibly react! one of two ways. They could either just stay at home crying to themselves everyday or they could gather up all! their faculties and commit themselves diligently to the textbooks, declaring that just one more time and they will definitely pass that exam.
Now, it the process, the person who’s committed may run into some difficulties. They may even feel a bit deflated because they’re trying really really!! hard but the results just don’t seem to be that great yet.
But hey!! At the end of it all, just do one single comparison and everything will be fine. The whole problem gets dissolved!
Basically, you just compare the person who’s committed to the person who has basically thrown everything out of the window. And then you tell that person: You know, just the fact that you’ve committed yourself is already just so, very! valuable! You didn’t actually have to do it, you know! Not everyone does that! I know people who (like person 1) who simply wallow in their misery and just ragequit life for a bit! I see! that effort you’ve been putting in, how hard you’ve been trying!!
And what does that do? Why, it eludes to said person a crucial fact that may have eluded them all this time!!!
See, it is possible that for this person, giving up never, ever crossed their mind. Instead, it was always, always about challenging themselves to succeed where they had previously failed. And so, by default they naturally view the world through a lens where not giving up underlies. In the meantime, even as difficulties abound, they simply never notice that others could have given up right there and then with a lil whimper.
So, how is this form of comparison not empowering??
Rather than comparing yourself to people who are already at enviable places that it would be oh so good if you were already at that point, I mean, hey!!! You’ve been going through your own painstaking journey! It might be the case that you are simply not meant to be at that point yet, but, keep it up and sooner or later you’ll be there!
No, no. Instead, check out the positive form of comparison, that which just makes the duality of things just oh so distinct. Perhaps you have experienced some things which would have toppled others, yet you’re still standing. Why! In that case, please make a comparison and value yourself for that! Despite all the difficulties that yeah, truthfully you may still face, hey!! Remember! That you’re even trying – it’s a win!!!
For instance (I even wrote a play about this before ), after facing some tragedies in life, people become hikikomoris and stay shut-in at home everyday. They don’t even try anymore as in a sense, they just give up on life for a bit. Well, let’s do duality. You faced such situations,,, And what? Did you become a hikikomori? No, you’re still trying hard!!!
Isn’t just that alone worthy of admiration already?
See, duality. One function the existence of opposites has is that that makes the presence of the positive side ever so distinct and precious.
However, where people oftentimes really tend to get caught up in the lens of how they’ve chosen to view the world, don’t ever forget!!! The fact that that’s NOT!!! the only set of lens that can be used to view and navigate the world, okay. No no no! That would literally be discrediting yourself already!
Instead, just by understanding how hard to come by your striving already is, that itself is a great way of valuing yourself, no?
Alright! Today’s article seems to be kinda super short, but I’m satisfied with it, so. Hah, it only appears to be short because the articles that I’ve previously written have been longer. Duality again, hah! Well, they will be as long as they’re meant to be yo! I’m satisfied with this topic already peeps!
Oh yeah. One last thing. I just remembered. See, even as we ourselves are stuck to the lens that we’re viewing the world through and its backstory, the same actually holds true for those around us!
And one major detriment of this is that this may cause people to take us for granted! Even amidst this striving, even despite this duality, they are only ever thinking: Why is this person not there yet? I’m not satisfied with their present! Meanwhile, hey! Have you ever thought about… like, simply the mere fact that they’re still striving so much: it is a present!
Don’t forget! You know, I previously talked about the hope-regret spectrum as an alternative to pleasure-pain and hedonism, but don’t forget! See I’ve noticed another significant spectrum too, the take for granted-appreciate spectrum. Oftentimes, we don’t!! appreciate what’s in front of us, and we fail to notice their value until they’re gone!! Then we feel like: ah, I totally never thought anything of this before, but… it’s So!
Like, hey!! Please treat what is precious in due with value, NOW!!! Because otherwise, that will only lead to… negative – regret!
So, I hope that this article can serve you with a better understanding of what form of comparison is very helpful to have and what sort of it is just besides the point, doesn’t click in terms of logic…
For all people for whom this article especially resonates with, I’d say: Please, as much as possible, try to alleviate, relieve your stress! Just keep going, dudes! Sooner or later, you WILL get there yo!! Relax! Appreciate every moment to its finest!!!
Anyway, I’m done for today! Have a good day!